Speak up babes

So many of us have no trouble talking about the things that we want. We talk about our future lives, our plans, our dreams and goals without reservations. We sit for hours on the phone with our new boyfriend or girlfriend talking about the life you desire to build and live together. We spend days and weeks planning vacations. We spend years of our lives planning our college life and the dream job while we’re in school. 

Get my point?

What we struggle with is talking about the things we do not want. We struggle with saying NO to the things that don’t fill us with joy or peace. 

So the question is: WHY DO WE NOT SPEAK UP for ourselves? 

I think we do it for various reasons. 

1. We want to keep the peace. But at what cost though? We want everyone else to be happy and for us not to be the destruction of peace. 
2. We have been silenced before. We were told that what we have to say won’t make a difference or it won’t matter to the listener. 
3. We think that what we have to say is not of value because we don’t feel valuable as a human. 

Well where does this come from?

1. It is possible that these ideologies stem from trauma (people pleaser)
2. We learned this indirectly from other adults and normalized being a peacekeeper. 
3. We have very low self esteem and forget how powerful we are. 

How can we correct this?

1. Work on trauma recovery with a counselor and/or coach.
2. Know that you have the divine right to speak up no matter how much your voice shakes. Others’ reactions or feelings are absolutely not your responsibility. 
3. Focus on knowing that when you feel good, you vibrate higher. If it doesn’t align with your spirit, it is not good for you. Listen to your intuition. Your intuition is your guide to live a life of alignment.